Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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