I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
