hell yes lets make some ravioli
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
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My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Come camping we have xanax and steaks