He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize