He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
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