I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
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