I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
