Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week