So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats