Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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