remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
