I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
