Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
