lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize