I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
