Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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