That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Send help, water and tortillas.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
