the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Randomize
