We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize