It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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