I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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