just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
