So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
please don't ironically join a cult
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