Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I've blown a few things in my day
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
