ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
as a side note pls kill me
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
