"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
