what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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