somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
