I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
