Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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