Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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