Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
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