oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
