our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It's rum buckets o'clock
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
