I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
We had to coat check the pizza.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
True strength comes from lack of pants
Randomize
