White coat. Heels.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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