you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Your penis caused this!
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