this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
