in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
