You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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