I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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