I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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