I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
