grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
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She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
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How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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