He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
