Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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