i permit you to call me
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
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