one two three fourrrrnication!
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize