How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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