You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I could make wine with my vomit
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
