I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
i out mim tonsoeep
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
