I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
